In one of those cringeworthy emails that circulate (I get at least two most days) came this which at least made me smile...

The strongman at a circus squeezed the juice from a lemon between his hands. He then said to the audience, "I will offer $200 to anyone in the audience who can squeeze another drop from this lemon.

A thin scholarly looking woman came forward, picked up the lemon, strained hard and managed to get a drop. The strongman was amazed. He paid the woman and asked, "What is the secret of your strength?"

"Practice," the woman answered. "I was the treasurer of a Church for thirty-two years!

 

And then this one I heard last week, which is a little more profound...

As of swimming pools, so of churches, all the noise and splashing comes from the shallow end.