This made me smile!  Today I received an invitation from a (very large) professional body of which I am a Member (the capital 'M' matters in this context) to apply for transfer to the class of Fellow.  Needless to say I won't be applying - I don't qualify, and probably, if I told them, they'd take away the letters I do have but still charge me the same fee to receive their magazine.

In a mischievous moment, I ran down the list of requirements to see which I do have, albeit not in an appropriate employment.  I've missed out or altered a few words, and end up with something we could almost use in churches....

Essential characteristics are:

• hold a position of senior responsibility and/or significant autonomy
• promotion of the profession to young practitioners and potential practitioners
• leadership qualities
• involvement in policy and strategy making decisions (technical and/or business)
• structured approach to CPD (evidence of presentations, published papers etc,)

Desirable

• highly specialist knowledge in a specific area
• strong evidence of resource management and/or personnel management and development
• applies a significant range of fundamental principles and complex techniques across a wide and often unpredictable range of contexts

Optional

• active development and application of new technologies at a senior level
• budgetary and financial control

what d'you think?!