I cannot imagine beginning a funeral service thus:

"Good day, my name is Catriona, I am am ordained Baptist minister accredited by the BUS and BUGB.  This service will include religion and is explicitly Christian so there will be hymns, prayers... Christians believe that..."

I can't imagine it, but it is exactly the way the two Humanist funerals I've attended began.  Don't get me wrong, I have no opposition to such 'ceremonies', indeed I think it it vital that 'non-religious' (which is actually not the same as Humanist) options are available to those who desire them.  And I am not criticising the way the services were conducted, each was carefully and sensitively delivered, included space for private reflection, a eulogy, some readings and some music.  Both of them were meaningful and positive experiences.

So, no religion - hmm.  In each funeral the celebrant used these words:

To everything there is a season...

A time to be born and a time to die.

Hmm, so not Ecclesiates 3:1 - 2 then.  No, not much.

No scared words - well no, except in poems that spoke of a Master and songs about the Arms of an Angel.

But beyond all of this what, for me, is lacking, is the assurance of hope that faith offers.  The promise that whilst death is a mystery and we cannot prove there is life beyond it, yet we trust that it might be so... not might as 'just about maybe' but might as in 'will'.  What is missing is the reassurance that we do not return to the world and live out our days - as best we can - ultimately with no eternal meaning or purpose.  What is missing is the promise that in the end it'll be alright.

I would not wish to inflict my faith-position on any grieving family, would not want to deny anyone the right to the kind of funeral that for them holds meaning.  For me though, however wonderful the eulogy, however beautiful the floral tributes, however moving the music, unless I am given both "strength for today and birhgt hope for tomorrow" I feel short -changed.

I was glad to be at my friends' funerals, glad to learn more about their lives BC, privileged to meet their families and life-long friends.  I was pleased to add my 'farewell' to those of others.  And I guess, if I am honest, that it has been good to reflect again on what a funeral is trying to achieve.