Tomorrow we have a 'difficult' funeral here in Dibley, as we say farewell to one of our younger members (in their fifties).
As I arrived at school today to set up, the locum caretaker, with whom we have a great relationship (along with the regular one) asked me it was possible still to believe in God when this happened. I was able to quote a conversation I'd had with this person a few weeks back in which she'd told me how even as a young person she'd appreciated that faith in God wouldn't guarantee immunity from suffering or struggle, but would give her strength to live through it. I went on to say that the God I believe in is not like a geni in a bottle who grants our every wish. He thought for a moment, smiled and said, I guess if it was like that, the place would be full every week. I'm not sure he was convinced of God, but he listened and will clearly think more - and this woman's faith continues to touch others.
A little later the next youngest person to me (she's 6 months older! We are the babies of the church) arrived to set out the tea things. As we talked about tomorrow's service, she asked who I had to talk to about it all, and how did I cope. After I'd explained about hiding behind the 'dog collar' (being in role) and how I'll clear off for an hour or two after the event to unwind, she just said, well you can come to my house if you need to. This woman is a quiet saint, never in your face with her faith, honest with her struggles and questions, yet she gets it.
The service went off alright, if a little subdued by events; I came home with final preparation to do for tomorrow but having glimsped something of the grace of God in an agnostic caretaker and quiet disicple.
May God grant me the grace and courage to hold God's people in my heart tomorrow.
Three weeks ago, my friend Jean and I at the start (end?) of Offa's Dyke at Sedbury Cliffs in the Bristol Channel. It's an odd kind of start/end to a walk because you have to walk through some very muddy fields and up a steep bank in order to get to the stone and officially start (or end) your walk. Then you have to back track to the road as you set off for Prestatyn (starting) or to Sedbury/Chepstow (ending). Seems a bit like life sometimes- you have to go backwards in order to go forwards. Perhaps I should have read the sign for how much to-ing and fro-ing I'd be doing in the following weeks!
This sign appears on the gates at either end of Disgwylfa Hill, one of the many we climbed up, over, round and down in the two weeks of walking. I combines gentle humour with some thought provoking ideas: a reminder that we don't actually own the earth and we should respect it.
St Mary's, Newchurch, is an old Anglican church with no loos and no running water, but who gave grasped something of Matthew 25. The church is open all the time for walkers and visitors to help themselves to tea, coffee, soft drinks and biscuits. Someone makes sure there is fresh water, someone supplies the milk, someone washes the cups... and it's all given for FREE.
We had a lot of fun along the way, but there were moments when it was plain old fashioned slog, and times when it hurt (a sprained ankle apiece and some 200m+ steep climbs to boot, have their impact!). Yet, each time we finally topped a hill/mountain the pain was forgotten as we enjoyed the views. But if you are reading this, and know Jean, beware her saying 'it goes up to start with' as this probably prefaces a 300m continuous steep climb with almost no footholds in the grass!
So, to end, here I am looking out over miles and miles of countryside towards the sea, towards jouney's end at Prestatyn - which of course is but the beginning of another journey, more adventures, laughter, pain, highs and lows.