Tonight we had what for Dibley is a very long Deacons' meeting - three hours.  In 'churches I have known' this would have been normal or even short.  I guess I have to be grateful that my folk usually get fidgety by 9:30 so that a 10:30 finish was unusual.

A fairly large chunk of the meeting was a time of sharing - how life and church are for each each of us at the moment.  People were honest and, on the whole, pretty open.  Fatigue and flatness seemed to be the operative words - everyone working more hours doing more things with more pressures.  Amazingly I did not feel either guilty or responsible when people said they felt church was 'flat.'

It wasn't a happy meeting, though there was no 'atmosphere', just a meeting of facing a lot of tough realities and starting to acknowledge that they won't suddenly come right if only we pray harder.  There was acknowledgement of yet another 'crunch time' looming, but that this one was different: whilst finances and building issues can be overcome or worked around, when the people have nothing left to give there is nowhere left to go.  I hope - and pray - that we do find a way through all this, but there was a real sense that come the AGM we could find ourselves, in the word I used, and apolgised because I didn't know a ministerially suitable equivalent, stuffed.

Amazingly, I am feeling fairly calm about this - but whether this is peace beyond comprehension or shere exhaustion I don't know!  Ah well a light weekend ahead with all of Sunday FREE!!!!