Last night we used the scripture reading set by CTBI as part of their Lent 2011 series, which was Psalm 32.  It is a well-loved and lovely psalm, very honest about the writer's experiences and need for reconciliation with God.  Just that verse 6 is a tad unfortunate just at the moment...

"Therefore let all who are faithful offer prayer to you; at a time of distress, the rush of mighty waters will not reach them."

I know this is the language of metaphor, and I am certainly not blaming anyone for using this set passage to guide our thoughts, just that we can be pretty confident that among those swept away in recent events, literally or metaphorically, are faithful people of prayer.

Of course, taking a verse from here or there is a dangerous practice, and the psalm continues to speak of God as a 'hiding place', a refuge not from but within the storm.

As the news continues to unfold, and as events are New Zealand, let alone the so-called 'third world' are almost forgotten inthe wake of those in Japan, we need to beware glib answers to complex questions as we continue to pray for those directly affected.

Lord, have mercy,

Chirst have mercy,

Lord have mercy

Over the last week or so I have begun to do certain things for the first time since my surgery; things I used to take for granted, and ay do again; things that are usually must a chore but brought a sense of achievement...

Just over a week ago I went a on a train on my own to town - this brought with it that strange blend of excitement and fear that a child has the first time they are allowed to go to town alone, in my case aged eleven on a bus.  The fear of being knocked and hurt, the concerns about the weight of shop doors (hurrah for automatic ones!) and the realisation that self-service restaurants are still 'off limits' when I'm alone as I can't (yet) carry the trays.  But it was good to be out on my own again - it's been a long time.

Last week I drove for the first time, after someone very kindly recharged the battery on my car.  I find car travel very uncomfortable at the moment, even if I am riding in a big flash car with comfy seats, so my little Saxo is not exactly super comfy.  Surprisingly the only bit that caused me 'bother' was reverse parking as twisting round to look over my left shoulder whilst steering pulled at the (pirate sized) scar on my back.

On Saturday I dusted my house and even cleaned my 'little' shower-room.  I hate housework but it was a real pleasure to be able to do these tasks again.  Still at least a couple of months before I'm allowed to hoover, sweep or mop, so I'm very grateful to my 'Mrs Mop'.

Yesterday I made it to church twice.  This isn't a measure of physical strength or flexibility, rather it is about energy levels and stamina.  To have enough brain power to concentrate through two acts of worship was great; to be able to hold conversations and not wilt totally was a bonus.

Funny how the little things can be the ones that end up mattering.

Still a long way to go to restored fitness - and this with a detour via the River of Radiation still to be crossed - but it is good to record the little firsts that mark my recovery.

This may seem like a no brainer... of course wisdom is to be desired, the Bible tells us so doesn't it?  There are whole hymns to wisdom in Proverbs, it's obvious.

Is it?

Genesis 2:6 NRSV

So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate; and she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate.

I'd never spotted that the text said 'wise' until I heard it read today, and wondered if it was a bit of GNB 'dumbing' so I checked it in other translations and in an interlinear Hebrew.  Sure enough the word was 'wise.'

I guess the significance is that whilst wisdom is desirable, good, Godly, it is not to be snatched for and cannot be attained simply or even effortlessly... there is a difference between knowledge (what the serpent said) and wisdom (what the woman aspired to).  Perhaps the fault was not the desire for wisdom, to be grown-up, to be able to make value judgements but the assumption that all that was needed was knowledge.

Perhaps there is a bit of similarity with Jesus' temptations to quick fixes - and indeed our own.  Wisdom is to be desired, but knowledge does not always lead us to be wise.

Anyone got any thoughts?

Last night I was reading the set portion of Matthew 9 and 10, although I got carried away and read a bit further than the suggestion of the notes.  One of the things that struck me is just how often the lists of the twelve disciples are read out of the context in which they are set.  So it is/was with Matthew 9/10.

Matthew 10: 1 - 8 NRSV

Then Jesus summoned his twelve disciples and gave them authority over unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to cure every disease and every sickness.
These are the names of the twelve apostles: first, Simon, also known as Peter, and his brother Andrew; James son of Zebedee, and his brother John; Philip and Bartholomew; Thomas and Matthew the tax collector; James son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus; Simon the Cananaean, and Judas Iscariot, the one who betrayed him.
These twelve Jesus sent out with the following instructions: "Go nowhere among the Gentiles, and enter no town of the Samaritans, but go rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.  As you go, proclaim the good news, 'The kingdom of heaven has come near.' Cure the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, cast out demons.

So, it is quite clear that Judas was one of those who went out on the crazy, exciting adventure of preaching the good news, curing sick people, raising dead people, cleansing lepers and casting out demons.  Wow!  All of which makes it the more heart-achingly sad that his story took the turn it did.

Matthew (and for that matter Luke) doesn't  record the twelve being sent out in twos, as does Mark 6:7.  Even so, I found myself wondering how the pairings worked out... were there obvious pairs like Peter and Andrew or did Jesus ignore with natural friendships and choose who would work with who in order to help them grow?  Who did Judas go with?  (Or for that matter Thomas, John, Simon the Zealot, James son of Alphaeus, Nathaniel/Thaddeus...)  What did they encounter?  How did their relationships develop on the way?  How did this experience impact Judas?

A few years ago a minister friend of mine had a crisis of faith and resigned their post.  Among questions they, and others, asked were what did that make of the rites they'd performed... were the (infant) baptisms still valid?  What of the sermons they had preached - were they of God or just clever rhetoric?  I would not set my friend alongside Judas, as though somehow they had betrayed Jesus to death, but just maybe there are some parallels?  What of the person whose cure had its origins in Judas' touch or prayer?  What of the person who found faith from hearing him speak?  Were these valid?  My gut instinct says 'yes'... and I suspect scripture would concord "whoever is not against us is for us."  In those moments, surely, Judas was 'for' not 'against'?

I wonder what you think?

The first year I consciously 'did' Lent I was 15.  I gave up sugar in tea/coffee (no small undertaking in a family where everyone else had two teaspoons of sugar in everything).  Over the following years the abstentions grew and grew - no sweets, no chocolate, no puddings, no sugar at all, no caffeine.  Each year I collected the money I would/might have spent on these and donated it to charity - SCIAFs 'wee box' idea is not exactly new, though it's a good one.

Yesterday's weekly shop included a pack of dark chocolate digestive biscuits, made by a firm based in Leicestershire as it happens.  So each day I can have just one chocolate digestive (that will be a challenge once the pack is open) as I ponder my many blessings and the temptations that we in the affluent west are so readily seduced by.  I don't think the cost of a pack of biscuits is going to make a good donation to anything, so I will, belatedly, join in with others across Bappy-land doing the Christian Aid 'Count Your Blessings' scheme.

It struck my in an idle moment that I've 'done Lent' for as many years as tradition tells us Jesus lived, so maybe I am entitled to a year off for good behaviour?!