Just for fun. 

In a couple of conversations I had today the following observations were made by the other people... and I managed to keep a straight face... just: -

"Even when I was at my biggest I had a flat tummy under the fat"  (Er, yeah, didn't/don't we all?)

On the statistics for car accidents... "women may have a lower number of accidents statistically but..." (um, sorry, either we have less or we don't...)

... the pastoral concerns part of the deacons' meeting includes the report of the deaths of two dogs.  It sounds ultra flippant, but it's not, these dogs were both pets in families for whom life is currently quite tough, and this was just one more blow to deal with.  Fortunately it seems the diaconal cats are both in good health, though a ten year old goldfish is evidently looking a bit iffy.  At least it made us all laugh and released some of the tension that inevitably arises as we work through the various pastoral concerns.

We didn't quite pray for 'Goldie' but I did just wonder if Alice was lurking somewhere in the background...

This morning I've been choosing hymns and songs for our Pentecost outreach event.  It has been an OK experience, though of necessity some I really like had to be omitted because they don't fit and some I dislike or am bored with had to be included - such is life.

One that had to be omitted was this one from New Zealand and in Common Ground...

Loving Spirit, loving Spirit

You have chosen me to be

You have drawn me to your wonder,

You have set your sign on me.

 

Like a mother, you enfold me,

Hold my life within your own,

Feed me with your very body,

Form me of your flesh and bone.

 

Like a father, you protect me,

Teach me the discerning eye,

Hoist me up upon your shoulder,

Let me see the world from high. 

 

Friend and lover, in your closeness

I am known and held and blessed

In your promise is my comfort,

In your presence I may rest.

 

Loving Spirit, loving Spirit,

You have chosen me to be,

You have drawn me to your wonder,

You have set your sign on me.

 

Shirley Erena Murray (c) Hope Publishing Co. via Copycare

 

For anyone who'd like to use it, and doesn't have access to Common Ground, at least the metre (87 87) is such that you can readily find a tune to use.

As it seems we are moving into branded church models... cafe, messy, pub etc., I reckon I was doing wrinklie church this morning.  Our lunch club members had a coffee morning to raise money for the local children's hospice, achieving the sum of £150 in an hour and a half.  We brought and bought (so now I have a tin of Ambrosia rice pudding and a plastic tray someone decided I needed!), chatted and listened, and generally had a good time together.  At the end of the morning a couple of us filled our cars with people and zimmers and delivered them back home, the left over bric-a-brac was boxed up to go to a charity shop and the host's house (not mine for once!) was restored to some sort of order.  All in all it was a good morning's work.

Shortly I have to gather up a couple of others and take them for a drive and a cuppa, and somewhere in the midst of it all fit in some desk based work.

Yesterday I discovered that you cease to be an adult when you reach age 100 - today my 102 year old raised money to help people who will never reach adulthood - some where in all of that Wrinklie Church was done.

Today I was on an Association training day for ministers and church workers on Safeguarding.  It was the nearest thing Baptists can muster to a three line whip, but the reality was that those who got involved were almost certainly those who already take the issue pretty seriously.  I have, in the past, sat through some dreadful training in this field, have heard leaders who know less about the topic than I do, and have been roundly lambasted (en bloc with others) simply for existing.  Today was just so different!

The trainer balanced a lovely sense of humour with some powerful and poignant role play (which he did, we observed), he was wise and practical, honest and open, gentle but persuasive.  Whilst I came away wondering just how many ministers are emotionally abused by their congregations (defined as 'persistent negative criticism and little warmth') I also came away thinking that the support networks in place in this association are superb in so many ways.

One bit that made me half smile and half wonder was the definitions of 'child' (0-18, except when it is 21 or 24) and 'adult' (18 - 99).  It seems my 102 year old lunch club member is actually too old to be vulnerable!!!  Ah me, what a daft old world we inhabit.

It was a good day, and I came away feeling that this was a course I would have happily paid for myself and considered it money well spent.  So as it was free and gratis for all EMBA ministers I was doubly happy.

If I wanted to be a true Dibleyite and point out "the only thing that was wrong with it" (cos nothing is allowed to be exempt for criticism here!) it was that the facilitator used the word 'folks' about six times too often for my liking - but that would be picky pedantry.