I have just read The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards.  It's described as being about redemption (at least at the end) but I'm not entirely sure.  More, it seems to me, to be about the outworking of a single decision - a choice made in haste and with honest, if foolhardy, intent, the consequences of which were worked out over a lifetime.  It is an unhappy tale, at least for the character we meet first and his close family, but one that provokes some thought.  I also read A Spot of Bother by Mark Haddon, a very different, and overall humourous tale, and included a fleeting mention of one Miss Cottingham, class teacher who filled me with terror at the grand old age of 9!  Yet here, too were hints of the interconnections of lives, the consequences of secrets and half-truths.  I suspect I must be getting too intense in my old age when my summer reading gets the old grey matter going - or is it just middle aged angst?!

When I was around 12, an English lesson introduced me to Roberts Frost's poem The Road Not Taken, which I now know inspired M Scott Peck's spirituality writing (which I have never read).  It was one of those poems that lodged deep inside and surfaces ever now and then.  Choices - consequences and the "impossibility of going back to repeat the experiment" as my old boss used to say.

This week the A level results came out, and I was being a 'responsible adult' with a friend of mine at her son's results day party.  Watching these young adults celebrate, observing the different characters and listening to the hopes and dreams mingled with the first stirrings of nostalgia (they chose to have a primary school sports day as their theme!) the poem came back to me along with memories of the last 26 years since my own (and, I thought at the time, dreadful) A level results arrived.

I guess I've been pretty fortunate - I have very few regrets about the choices I've made along the way, and I'd like to think that I've learned from the mistakes I've made.  Watching these youngsters, and knowing some of what lies ahead of them - joy and sorrow - is a strange experience.  The girl with five grade A's and no confidence, the shy boy whose grades meant he didn't get in to his first choice, the couple who've chosen to go to the same university because they can't stand the thought of separation...  what will their futures hold?  How will the party be recalled in 26 years time when they are middle aged (and I am old!)?  Who will still keep in touch with whom?  What dreams will lie shattered on the floor?  Will any of them be doing this navel gazing?

The Memory Keeper's Daughter centred on a very big decision made in haste and its consequences over a life time.  Not every choice is as dramatic or its consequences so far-reaching but the book did make me think afresh about the decisions I make and the ripple effects they have  - whether it's the brand of coffee I buy, the path I choose on an afternoon stroll, the books I read or the sermons I preach.  I suspect that at the end of time when the review takes place, the sum of the small, seemingly inconsequential, decisions will be as great if not greater than the one or two mammoth ones I wrestled with.

All very deep as a response to a bit of summer reading - maybe next time I'll read some real rubbish!

Today I received my sparkly copy of Theological Reflection: Sources courtesy of Amazon.  Lots of creep points for buying the Prof's latest book, I trust.  A few sly smirks when flicking through I found bullet points and numbered lists - it's not just me after all...  Also a sense that actually I have heard of quite a few of these people, so maybe I'm not quite so ignorant after all.

Amongst the flicking, I found some poetry by Oscar Romero, and this one (dated 19 December 1977) struck me...

Let us not measure the church

by the number of its members

Or by its material buildings.

The church has built many houses of worship,

many seminaries,

many buildings have beeen taken from her.

They have been stolen

and turned into libraries

and barracks

and markets

and other things.

That doesn't matter.

The material walls here will be left behind in history.

What matters is you,

the people,

your hearts

God's grace giving you God's truth and life.

Don't measure yourselves by numbers.

Measure yourselves by the sincerity of heart

with which you follow the truth and light

of our divine Redeemer.

Theological Reflection: Sources, Elaine Graham, Heather Walton and Frances Ward, London, SCM, 2007 p. 368 

Yes and Amen

A while back I saw a spoof version of the famous 'Footprints' poem that ended up something like 'when you see only one set of footprints it was then that we were hopping' (there's also a version about dancing).  Over the last week or so, as I've been pondering what to say about Habakkuk on 'authenticity' it came back to me, and I think that, whatever its intention, it actually has a better message than the original.

Our life experience is not usually that we are carried through the tough times, rather that are a real slog - not unlike hopping a long distance.  I think I'd rather imagine God hopping alongside me, sharing in my struggles, than as someone who scoops me up out of the nastiness of real life.  I think this is more authentic theology (mourn with those who mourn, laugh with those who laugh) and more helpful.  If we believe, as I do, that in the cross, Jesus and hence God somehow embraced and shared suffering, then a God who shares the hopping and the dancing seems good to me.

This week our TV news has been filled with accounts of murder and mayhem.  People may well ask where God is.  Hopping mad with those who are enraged, limping with those who limp from moment to moment - and big enough to take our anger, questioning and pain.  "Our God is a great big God" who hops with us, hand in hand.

You know the ones...

Thou shalt start thy morning service at 10:30 a.m. and evening services at 6:00 p.m.  [It is regretted that in some places heresy such as bus timetables or rental arrangements have been permitted to corrupt the natural order and morning service commence at 10:45 or 11:00.  In certain places (please pray for them) a single 3 p.m. service is now deemed permissable!!!]

Thou shalt keep thy services to 60 minutes unless it is Communion Sunday in which case 75 is permitted.

Thou shalt have Communion on the evening of the first Sunday of the month and the morning of the third Sunday of the month.  Where there is a fifth Sunday in the month thy minister may get confused and do Communion again; where this is so thou shalt forgive thy minister as a mere fool for Christ.

Thou shalt sing only from the green book/red book/SOF book/MP book/powerpoint as thy musicians shall dictate, and all single verse songs shall be sung a minimum of twice, though 3.5 times, beginning half way through shalt be preferred if more than 50 persons are present. 

Thou shalt sing four hymns on ordinary Sundays, five when thou celebratest the Lord's Supper.

Thou shalt provide for children to be sent eleswhere in the premsies to spare them the full horrors of listening unto the sermon.  Here they shalt engage in creative means of exploring faith including disucssion and questioning.  Then thou shalt be surprised that they leave the church when thou deemest them too old for this method of learning to listen for God.

Thou shalt hold Church Meetings at 7:30 p.m. (unless thou art in NWBA in which case it shall be Sundays after the service) and thy meetings shall not exceed a duration of 2.5 hours unless thou precedest them with coffee.  Likewise thy deacons shall meet for at least 3 hours, and meetings continuing unto midnight are yea verily impressive...

Any others?

Every now and then I post on this topic, usually when I've been away from my own little patch and have experienced the paucity of prayer in worship elsewhere.

Evangelical Christians are big on 'Quiet Times' and 'Personal Prayer' or even 'Prayer Meetings' to which no one comes (cynical?  you bet!) but we are rubbish at corporate prayer.  Thinking back to this year's Baptist Assembly, my only experience of corporate intercessory prayer was in the closing All Age Worship; apart from that and the prayers for Minsiters and Missionaries, it was mainly a lot of 'really just wow Jesus' stuff.

Here in Costa del Old Fangled, we have two very distinct prayer slots in the service - at the start is a combination of Praise/Thanks and Confession (sometimes as two distinct items rather than one flowing into the other); after the sermon (and before Communion if it's that week) we have 'Prayers for Others' led by various people on a rota, which include world affairs, local issues and finally our own fellowship.  I honestly believe that this connection of 'church and world' begins to shape our thinking about Mission and allows God to speak to us about our role as Good News (word made flesh); in churches where there is no prayer for the world/local community I suspect there is less urgency to live out the connection as church becomes the place we go to enjoy God.

This Sunday our service is a rare 'one woman show' when I will lead the intercessions.  It is a joy and privilege to lead God's people in praying for God's world; just wish a few more Baptist events would discover it...