This coming Sunday the focus is the call of the first disicples according to John's gospel.  Yesterday I had lots of fun comparing the four gospels, reading assorted commentaries and beginning to think a bit about the similarities and differences in what is said and why.

I have one big fat NavPress book on the topic of disicpleship.  I don't much like it, because it has a defensive tone along the lines of 'we had to rescue this ancient understanding from dodgy liberals and main stream churches and make it our own' rather than 'hey, look what we can learn from Catholics, and those with a different emphasis in their theology'.  I also don't like that is way to literal and precise in its time-scale of Jesus ministry (this phase took x months - really?!).  Despite that, dipping into it was very helpful in stirring my creative juices.

I also have an equally fat book on the varied quests for the historical Jesus, which also talks a lot about disicpleship/ disciple making.  Not defensive, and pretty academic, it expresses ideas and prompted thoughts consistent with and/or complimentaty to, those in the first book.

PAYG this week also has a 'call and response' flavour to it (today was the call of Samuel), which adds another slant to my thinking and hearing.

Lots of ideas bubbling away in my subconscious which will, hopefully, emerge into a half-decent sermon.

So, a teaser for anyone who wants to do a bit of advance thinking - what are the first recorded words of Jesus and why?  (And yes, that question is deliberately open-ended as to which gospels you look in!)

Today has an odd start as I have an appointment at 10:30 to get my new lympohedema sleeve and glove... as my right hand is puffed up and straigthening my fingers hurts, I will be very glad to get it squished! 

Anyway, I have already done Sunday's PowerPoint and a round up of blogs and social media stuff...

New Blogger on the Block, well kind of, is Ruth my former research superivsor, preacher-inner and I like to think, friend.  I am looking forward to reading her musings and hope she will get some fun from blogging along the way.

Since (metaphorically) getting my fingers badly burned a couple of years back, I've been much more wary about linking cancer blogs.  But this one has been recommended to me by both ministers and medics and I've followed it on and off for a while.  It seems to be gaining a higher profile of late, is clearly genuine, and is a thoughtful, intelligent read.

I'm not a fan of soap operas, though ocassionally I succomb to 'River City' just because it's set in Glasgow.  Last night the Eastenders breast cancer story began in earnest, and for some reason it was on in the background as I did other stuff.  I think what surprised me was the detailed diagnosis and outline treatment plan that were given - a credible and realistic portrayal, but unusual.  Assuming they are sticking with a primary cancer story line, and assuming the script writer miracle cure doesn't arise, they are committing themsleves to a year long storyline - neoadjuvant chemo, mastectomy and radiotherapy.  I'm not suddenly going to become an Eastenders watcher, but if they manage a credible protrayal there is a lot of good that can be done.  In case anyone wonders, my diagnosis was different from that of 'Carol' but my treatment plan more or less the same; a credible portrayal won't be a copy of my experience, or anyone else's, but there should be moments that resonate.  Time will tell.

Looking forward to the rest of my week - plenty to occupy me one way and another.

The trip to New Zealand draws clsoer and looms larger, and I still have a lot of work to do on my conference paper - the first iteration is almost there but I feel a major rewrite might be a better idea, at least as an option once I can gauge the 'feel' of the event into which I am speaking.  The current version is a bit autoethnographic (so kind of reflective autobiography, with a fair few anecdote-type bits) and I think something a bit more structured/scientific might be a better contribution, at least from an academic viewpoint.  Not long now to get it done, but long enough, and each iteration helps clarify my thoughts.

Yesterday I booked a trip from Auckland to Rotarua - not exactly a cheap day out, but it sounds wonderful, and gives access to several 'must see' sites/sights.  I also advance booked the 'hop-on hop-off' tour bus which, whilst twice the price I've paid anywhere else, seems a good investment.  This morning I have order UEA and NZ currency - always makes me smile when you say to the bank (or whoever) I'd like 'this much' and they reply that they can offer you 'that much'.  Ah well, it will all come out in the wash, I'm sure.

Excitement and apprehenshion each beginning to develop, which, overall feels like a healthy balance.

So today we had the Baptism of Jesus a la Matthew, and the start of Isaiah 42, one of the 'servant songs'.

And I wanted it to be a fairly gentle service, not too much by way of challenges and something by way of encouragement, which the servant song does very nicely.

As part of our all age bit, we made origmai hearts with blessings drawn and written (drawn as some people can't read or wirte, some people have limited English; written as lots of people are words persons) inside them which we then gathered and redistributed.  It pretty much worked except one fewer blessing went into the basket than was taken out - so there wasn't one left for me.  That made me smile, and I think that in that I was blessed - blessed that people joined in, blessed that everyone else got  a herat to take home, blessed with the gift of a smile.

The servant song is rich in enouragement, in how it speaks of God and of the servant, understood by Christians to be Jesus. 

Two promises to treasure for the year ahead, I think, if we first dare to see ourselves as the servant(s) of God...

Firstly God loves us and delights in us.  The love we pretty much take as read, but delight God looks on us, and smiles, is thrilled, dances a happy dance, whatever it is that God does to demonstrate delight... wow!

Secondly, God takes us by the hand.  God is no mere bystander, no remote general barking orders.  God is there, in the thick of it, holding our hands.  The squeeze of friend, perhaps, or the firm, reassuring hand of a parent; the steadying of someone wiser, or the gentle tug of one drawing us into an adventure.  An old hand, a young hand, a familiar hand, a strange hand.  However we imagine it, God's hand is in ours - or ours is in God's. As the slightly annoying (pace Mr Redman) worship would express it:

"Never once did we ever walk alone

Never once did You leave us on our own

You are faithful, God, You are faithful""

From 'Never Once' by Matt Redman

Beloved, delighted in, held secure - with promises like these to return to and remember in the days and weeks ahead, 2014 is already blessed.

Today I am working from home because a number of items ordered online are due to be delivered (so far one has arrived, one is due between 13:47 and 14:47 and the other is 'on its way' whatever that means).

Already today I have editted and submitted a book review, written a contribution to a discussion paper, created the outline order of service for a week on Sunday and written over a thousand words of my conference paper.

This level of productivity is no longer normal - all too often I sit and stare at my computer screen and my brain freezes up at the prospect of committing any words to 'paper'.  I'm not sure why this is, though I am working quite hard to try to understand it, as it makes life quite tricky when 'words' are your sole deliverable!

Whatever has prompted this productivity, I am very grateful - and just hope it continues for the rest of the day so I can get a full draft of paper completed, not least as it's only a month now until I head far south to deliver it!

Perhaps it is fitting that the items I am waiting for are theology books and a NZ travel adapter?!