No, this is not confession time nor self flagellation time, but something that struck me as I have been re-reading commentaries ahead of leading a Bible Study next week on James 3:1 - 12.  The last time I looked at them, last autumn, I confess I skipped over all the detailed analytical stuff, partly cos my brain was still not up for reading Greek, and partly because I was wanting broader brush strokes.  Today, I noticed something in one commentary, then spotted it in another, and yet neither of the writers seemed to spot the irony of what they were (or were not) saying.

The opening of James 3 is roughly thus: 'not many of us should apsire to be teachers, because more is expected of them, and we all make mistakes.' and then moves into a plethora of examples of very small things that have potential for huge impact - whether it is a spark, a ship's rudder or a bit in the mouth of a horse.  All good, self-explantory stuff: little thing, big impact which could be destructive.

The two commentators spent lots of words noting that the start of verse three, in Greek, could be (based on extant manuscripts I assume):

• ei de
• ide
• eide
• idou

The difference seems small when it is written down, but the sentence is changed by whichever is chosen. For example:

if we put bits in horses' mouths....

behold, we put bits in horses' mouths...

As the commentators note, in this case it doesn't matter much which word we choose, because the message isn't substantively altered.  But, whilst they note the need for interperative choice, and one even asks 'how do you decide which is the correct choice', neither makes the connection that seemed to me really obvious - that here, in this text, is a teeny weeny example of just how tricky it is to get this right.  We all make mistakes, a word missed or mistyped here, a punctuation slip there, and the meaning changes, sometimes with catastrophic results.  It is entirely feasible that trascription errors or even poor handwriting exaplin the differences... the pen has like potnetial to the tongue.

All of which has given me an idea to research a little exercise for the participants to share as a 'warm up' if only I can find sufficient suitable words and phrases...

Growing up where I did, the Wars of the Roses and the associated battle for the English throne were not just history, they were local interest.  The third and final primary school I went too had four 'houses' named Gloucester, Warwick, Lancaster and York after some of the key players in that process, and of course the Northamptonshire emblem is a Tudor Rose, the combination of those of Lancaster and York.  So for me, this is interesting at more than a merely intellectual level. 

The Battle of Northampton took place in what is now Delapre Abbey, a place I visited frequently as a child, and where in 1990 two oak trees planted as part of the town's charter 800 year celebrations (technically 1989) are memorials to my Dad - I recall tracking them down one cold autumn day and gathering fallen leaves as a memento. 

I've also spent many happy hours wandering the Bosworth battle field, and eaten a few Christmas meals in the cafe-restaurant there with the lunch club that Dibley BC ran for five years.

History - his story - and my story, overlapping and interconnecting in some small way.  Well it interests me!!

Each week in Morning Worship, we have a psalm or an anthem, chosen by our Musical Director (sounds way more posh than reality, but he is absolutely BRILLIANT).  This morning we had one of my favourites:

I will be with you wherever you go.
Go now throughout the world!
I will be with you in all that you say.
Go now and spread my word!

Come, walk with me on stormy waters.
Why fear? Reach out, and I'll be there.
    Chorus

And you, my friend, will you now leave me,
or do you know me as your Lord?
    Chorus

Your life will be transformed with power
by living truly in my name.
    Chorus

And if you say: 'Yes, Lord, I love you,'
then feed my lambs and feed my sheep.
    Chorus

Gerard Markland (born 1953) © 1978 Kevin Mayhew Ltd

If memory serves correctly (it may not) this was the piece we used at the first service I took after I made my cancer diagnosis public; certainly it was used in a service around that time, and really spoke to my heart at a time when I was utterly terrified.  It feels pertinent that we sang it today, the second anniversary of my surgery, when I feel happy, fulfilled and very much alive. 

I am really miffed that I can't find a video or mp3 of this gorgeous piece online, so I can't share it with you, but maybe you can find a recording somewhere (for anyone in the know, a recording of the service will be on the Gathering Place website in due course.)

A propos of nothing whatsoever.

Holly Cat has lived with me for roughly eighteen months.  We get on well and she often sits next to me on the settee, sometimes even extending her front paws onto my knee.  Today she actually sat on my lap, curled up and stayed put for a full ten minutes. 

A purr-fect end to what was, in my opinion, a good morning at church.  I don't often say things like "God was moving" or "the Spirit was abroad" because I think they are bad theology - God is always moving, the Spirit is always abroad - but as I looked around during the celebration of Communion I did feel that something was afoot... that somehow we (or I anyway) had tuned in a teensy bit more with God.

Preaching on the lectionary gospel, and Jesus nearly getting lynched by the congregation at Nazareth was challenging, but I loved working with it this week, and I expect that made a huge difference to what I delivered.

Candlemas - the Presentation of Christ in the Temple

Today features in my personal calendar as one of the 'milestone' events.  Two years ago to the date, I went into hospital for my mastectomy and immediate reconstruction.  Last year I posted about  Candlemas and Other Associations .  The year before, up at some ludicrous hour, I posted this.

Having noted those two links, I wondered what else I had written about as previous 2nd February blogposts...

2010 - about a prayer breakfast with the local C of S

2009 - a lighthearted reflection on dressing up to walk through snow for a hospital visit

2008 - two posts, one arising from a Vision Day, led by someone who is no longer in pastoral ministry, for Dibley BC, and one about plans for a multi-sensory Easter experience

2007 - no post on 2nd Feb, one the day before, three the day after!  So I chose this one, which was about the idea of a pub-based midweek event, which Dibley ran for a couple of years

2006 - I was a far less prolific blogger in those days - nothing on the date or anywhere near.  In the end I picked this one from 31st Jan, because every now and again the same truth emerges - Catriona the Risk Assessor is who God called to be Catriona the Minister!

Interesting to look back and see what was occupying my thoughts and my activities.  Interesting to see what has changed and what has stayed the same.  Interesting to see how my blog has changed in style and content (to say nothing of frequency!) in that time.

As I look back, I do so with a sense of satisfaction.  Not smug satisfaction at how wonderful I have been or how much I've achieved, but healthy satisfaction.  Satisfaction that, for all my flaws and foibles, for all my foot-in-mouth moments, for all my anxieties and fears, I have exercised a worthwhile ministry, have exercised the ministry to which God called me, and for which God equipped me.  And that encouraged me to carry on doing just that - going forward in the footsteps of Jesus, tripping and stumbling, biting my tongue, wondering and even worrying, for the journey has many miles, and many more milestones, still to come.

Here I am Lord - employ me according to your good will.